Why Walking?

One foot in front of the other, one step at a time... But why walking? If I wanted to shorten this journey and perhaps even make it more valuable for the physical journey, why not jog or run instead of walk?

As a society, we are too impatient. We want instant results, fast action, no waiting - but what we get isn't necessarily the best option. To take this journey faster...

• Physically: Running or jogging is harder on the knees and more jarring to the body, which can result in greater injuries. On uncertain terrain, a faster pace is more dangerous, which could limit just where my journey takes me, no matter how quickly I get there.
• Mentally: A faster pace requires greater attention to one's route and footing, leaving less mental stamina for study, whether I am bringing along a book, magazine, or audio material to enjoy along the way.
• Spiritually: Getting this journey over faster may completely negate the spiritual travels, as a faster completion is less time for the introspection necessary for healing, assimilating new thoughts, and coming to terms with wounds that will never disappear.

I just like walking, and you never know what interesting places you will explore with each step. Furthermore, there are many ways to walk, and I'm sure I'll do them all sometime in this 1,000 miles; striding, traipsing, or hiking when the energy is high and the mood is positive, ambling and rambling on pleasant but more contemplative days, pacing, patrolling, or treading in anger, and shuffling on days when the stiffness or injuries mount up.

I have always enjoyed walking; from a mile-eating hike along a well-trodden path to a casual stroll around the neighborhood. By incorporating walking into my daily life now in such a highly visible, accountable way, I hope to rediscover that enjoyment and build a pattern of behavior that will last far beyond the counted miles. I could workout at the gym, schedule a personal trainer, attend exercise classes, or do other things to take the same physical journey - ignoring that they would not provide the same mental or spiritual benefits - but would I really keep up with those temporary habits once my goals were met? History says not. While I may be counting to 1,000 miles in the next year, with walking, I hope this journey will never be complete.

Always another walk to go on.

The Spiritual Journey

The third part of my year's long journey to walk 1,000 miles has nothing to do with distance, weight loss, health, mental prowess, or life-long learning, but is about spirit.

Defining "spiritual" for me has nothing to do with religion; spiritual is the emotional connection you feel to those around you, to the world you live in, to the life you lead. It is the perception of self you have, the values you uphold, and the way you live your life in appreciation and joy.

Unfortunately, much of this spiritual side has been missing from my life for many years. Instead, life has been lived in the day-to-day rush of obligations, duty, and stress, taking as truth and fact that which others say and failing to examine those statements within myself. For with that examination, holes glare forth and it is easier to see the flaws of others even as you recognize your own. None of us are perfect, but it is in examining that imperfection without judgement and without censure that you are able to learn from it and begin to repair it. If others choose not to do the same, that is not a reflection on you and not something you can help them with; we all have to make a spiritual journey on our own.

Lofty words and a lofty purpose, perhaps, but in the next year I intend to battle demons I've kept locked within my spiritual heart for years. Some of those demons may have died in the time since I barricaded them away, while other demons have grown stronger and more secure in their power because their wrath can still escape and wound me at the slightest reverberation of their insane cries. But I will turn a deaf ear no longer, nor will I validate the assumption that we all have demons to hide.

For we all have demons, that's true, but only when they are no longer hidden can they finally be defeated, one step - one mile - at a time.

The Mental Journey

Physical, mental, and spiritual - that is what I hope my walk of 1,000 miles in 2013 will be. But defining a mental journey is harder than simply counting the steps that add up to the mileage goal.

My mental journey in the coming year will be two-fold. First, I want to study more and broach topics I wouldn't normally consider, stretching my mental boundaries, perhaps even stretching them back to a college campus for a second degree; even if they don't stretch a full 1,000 miles, the effort alone will be worthwhile. There is so much to learn in this world, and too often we stay in our small corner and fail to appreciate the larger views around us. Only by learning history, science, languages, culture, and more, can we truly begin to integrate an entire world into that which we call our worldview. I absolutely want my mental worldview to grow on this journey.

The second part of my mental journey will be to redefine concepts within myself. Because of barbs leveled at me from different sources through my life, from deliberate indifference to cruel insults to vitriolic attacks by those who claimed to be friends or family, I have developed warped definitions of accomplishment, success, and productivity. I readily admit to being a perfectionist, a workaholic, and obsessive-compulsive about details. In some ways, this serves me well, but in others, it skews my days with highs and lows that get stuck in my mental pathways, leading to a cycle of self-blame and recriminations that don't match the true offense (the perceived offense being much larger). I need to develop a better mental sense of scale, and I hope as the physical scale of this journey becomes clearer, so too will the mental scale be clarified.

There is no one of any age, education, or station in life who could not benefit from mental growth. By deliberately embracing that growth as part of this journey, I hope to create a new mental sense that can stay with me far further than just 1,000 miles.

The Physical Journey

I said before that this 1,000 mile journey is more than just those miles. It is a physical, mental, and spiritual journey, but what does that mean? A journey is defined as "an act of traveling from one place to another." For me, those three journeys are all equally important, and I cannot reach the destination I hope to without each of them.

Ironically, it is the physical journey that will travel the least - despite the walking, I have no intention of this journey taking me any distance from my home. I will walk my last mile in the same place I walk my first, so in that respect, the journey goes nowhere. But I hope that no matter where my feet stroll, I physically end up far from where I feel myself to be now.

All my life, I have struggled with my weight. From teasing in school and insults from family to not being able to find clothing that fits my shape to little tricks developed in the hopes that the scale goes down, my weight has haunted me for decades. I'm fortunate in that I have no realistic health complications related to weight, and I know I'm  not considered as severely obese as others, but it's a personal journey to my own better weight, not the weight that society may dictate as ideal or desirable. 

Losing weight is only part of the physical journey I want these 1,000 miles to take me on, however. I want to grow healthier for myself and for my family, to enjoy the life I live with every step. I want to improve my posture and my skin tone, increase my energy, and become more flexible. Walking will do many of those things, and as small steps build into multiple miles, I hope to take additional non-walking steps to accomplish other physical goals.

Physically, there are a great many places this journey can take me - if I have the strength and energy to take those first steps and walk that first mile.

Who Am I?

If you're going on a long journey with someone, it's nice to know them a bit first. While you'll undoubtedly get to know much more about me with every mile I walk, let me introduce myself first.

I am in my mid-thirties, married, with a family whom I love dearly. I have a bachelor's degree, am a former teacher, and own my own home. I work full-time as a freelance writer and editor, and I volunteer weekly at a local library repairing and rebinding books. I love wild birds, enjoy cruise vacations, am a relatively accomplished cook and baker, and in spare moments that are far too few, am an avid reader. My favorite color varies from day to day, and my favorite food is chocolate.

But what does that tell you about me? Much too little, I'm afraid. It doesn't tell you of the emotional abuse, both deliberate and incidental, I've suffered at the hands of three family branches, the vile names I've been called, the blame for others' issues that has been placed upon my head. It doesn't tell you of my own poorness of self-worth, nor does it detail my fractured mentality that can make each day a debilitating fog. A simple introduction doesn't clarify my internal turmoil and torture, nor does it explain the disconnect I feel from much of society or what strategies I've developed to soothe those wounds and hide them from others.

Likewise, a basic introduction doesn't share my mental resolve, creativity, or strength I've discovered. Strength, I hope, that will carry me 5,280,000 feet, and far more steps toward my goals. Along the way I have no doubt my resolve will be tested, and my creativity will be stretched to keep one foot in front of the other, mentally and physically. I've never in my life shied from a challenge, however, and here I stand at the starting line, feet poised.

I will avoid nothing on this journey, nor will I shy from truths, pleasant or unpleasant. I have no doubt there will be steps backward as well as forward, but if I end the day even one foot forward from where I began it, that is positive.

It truly is the first step that is the hardest.

Beginning a Journey

This quote, from Chinese philosopher and founder of Taoism Lao-Tzu, is one familiar to many people in many cultures, and for each one it has different meanings. It can be spiritual, motivational, even romantic, but no matter what the interpretation, the meaning is clear - even the longest journey begins with the smallest piece, and those pieces together make something far greater than themselves.

Today, I begin a journey of a thousand miles. Like any study of philosophy or self, I do not yet know where the destination will be, but I hope it takes me somewhere far from where I find myself now - physically, mentally, and spiritually - and each one of those journeys has a different meaning.

• Physically - I hope to literally walk 1,000 miles in 2013.
• Mentally - I hope to improve my intellect and mental state.
• Spiritually - I hope to better my self perception and confidence.

But no great journey begins on a whim. I've been planning this for several weeks now, and will take the next month to prepare for those important first physical, mental, and spiritual steps, including better exploring each type of journey this will be. I hope you'll join me on this journey, and I hope it will take you to somewhere better for yourself.

Where will you journey today?